Key insights
- An individual investor expresses bullish sentiment on Costco (COST) following earnings, citing increased membership fees and e-commerce growth as positive catalysts. The author's enthusiasm, while strong, is unlikely to have a significant impact on the broader US equity market.

Fellas. Costco earnings are here and I'm harder than a frozen Kirkland lasagna.
They're hiking membership fees. 82,000,000 of us addicts are about to pay five extra dollars to keep mainlining rotisserie chicken dopamine. That's $400 million they didn't lift a finger for. That's not retail. That's a protection racket with free samples.
E-commerce up 22% because Gary from accounting finally learned how Wi-Fi works. The app recommends toilet paper now. BULLISH.
The P/E is 52. My blood pressure is higher. Don't care. This stock is my personality and my retirement plan.
Calls. Shares. Whatever. Just buy it and go eat a churro.
Position: COST 29 May 26 1000C 🚀🌭